Saturday, March 31, 2012

Enjoying the process


Its one thing to be in a creative process, but  another to be engaged with  a creative process.  During these past months I have become immersed in my work in a way I haven’t been for a long time.  It’s glorious to be so involved again, it is what I have been yearning for and yet now that I am here,  I feel a part of myself rushing through the process rather than letting myself lavish in the exploration.  I find myself expending my energy thinking about what the art will become rather than letting myself bathe in the joyous creative process of ideas and materials becoming. It’s the classic dilemma of missing what the moment has to offer because I am focused on the future. 
Realizing this consciously has helped me to slow down and reflect on some of the specifics of how I work and what supports my practice.  Articulating some of these things has helped me to really start enjoying making art  and not only that, but making the process a true investigation that is taking me to places I never would have imagined.  Some things I have noticed:

Patience.
When I make videos I normally don’t know what the video will be.  I have an abstract idea that leads me to videotape an action although it is in the editing that I discover the story.  Since I don’t know what the video is about when I am shooting, it is imperative that I am patient with the editing process and I need to allow myself to PLAY with the footage.   In order for this to work, I have to be interested in the footage and give myself time to look at it, manipulate it, make mistakes with the footage and ultimately discover something fascinating when I least expect it. Demanding that the footage become meaningful immediately destroys this process. Instead I need to be in the unknown and enjoy being in this unknown.

Unknown
I think we all sort of hate the unknown.  We live in a difficult world where we need to be practical in order to survive.  We need to make plans and know where we are going so we can make good choices.  This kind of works in life although it doesn’t always work with art. It depends on the kind of work you are making.  For myself,  I need to be able to spend a lot of time in the unknown where there aren’t many conscious plans, storyboards or grand strategies.  My process and what arises from it get more interesting the less I try to hold my ground and plan where I am going.   
Left-handed drawing
Repetition
On some level, I have been making the same work for over 20 years.  I continuously go back to the same figures, movements and concepts. Some judgmental part of my mind thinks this is very boring and I should do something new.  But I think that this going back to the same ideas and images over and over again is what a deep exploration is about.  It’s fascinating to keep entering the same terrain and find something when I am sure there is nothing left.  It is a good idea for me to give up on a notion of progress or moving on and instead think about  going deeper. I have been drawing figures all my life, but recently explored what it would be like to draw these figures with my left hand.  To my surprise, a whole new community of figures have shown themselves to me.  What was old and repetitive is new again.

Enjoy your process, however it manifests for you.
Be well,
Michele

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